Christmas, revisited.

My new cook dinner strategy. I let Jake play with the envelopes that the day's Christmas cards arrive in while the bigs help me. Keeps him busy the entire time I cook.

All three "help" me make a gigantic batch of meatballs and gravy.

Jake slept till 7:45 yesterday and Nate got up with the bigs. When I came downstairs, this is how I found my family.

Luke has a heart to heart with Santa.

Sixteen parents and over 20 kids. Chaos!

I was reading this the other day, and laughing.

It is still so me, yet I love Christmas this year. I love seeing the kids get so excited putting up the tree, I love our family traditions, I love the way they had fun helping pick and wrap and deliver presents to kids who have less than them. I love Christmas, and I was even really excited to pick out their presents (Luke is getting soccer goals/cones and a batcave, and Jules is getting a dollhouse and little dollhouse people). Stockings as well, of course, laden with things like Dino-Eggs and toothpaste and toothbrushes and stickers and silly putty and all of the other delightfully cheap and useful things that inspire fervor and joy in my children.

I still loathe the whole Santa thing (I could write an entire discourse on this, but to save you time and nutshell it I will confine myself to one measly little hastily written paragraph.....).

The other day when we were filming this commercial my friend Brian needed some wrapping paper to wrap up the thing for the fake "opening of gift scene" in front of our tree. I came downstairs with wrapping paper, and Brian got this aghast look on his face and said "This isn't SANTA PAPER, IS IT? IS THIS SANTA PAPER? WE CAN TOTALLY SKIP WRAPPING THIS IF IT IS! IS IT OKAY IF YOUR KIDS SEE THIS????". I was totally confused. Then I remembered that he had three young kids and they must be really into the Santa thing. We aren't. I laughed and said yes, this paper was fine. Then I sat and wrapped presents in front of my kids yesterday using the same paper that their presents will be wrapped in. Why? Because Santa isn't real. And quite frankly, I am not interested in CSI type OMG we have to perpetuate the super duper secret lie of Santa like it is a religion thing. Santa is fake. Giving, and love, and the spiritual aspects of the holiday, whatever your tradition, are real. We really, really try to focus on the giving and love part, and downplay the whole Santa thingy. Santa is cool, I'm no hater, and he is an easily recognizable way to point to the giving and love thing in a culturally appropriate way to our children........but at the end of the day, folks, Santa does not work hard for and procure said presents......we do. I will not lie to my kids about Santa. I will lie to them about plenty of other things when they suit my needs, ("This song is about being kind to your sister", "No! This isn't chocolate pudding, it is Mommy's vitamin" etc)....but I'm just not interested in 3000 levels of ninja stealth lies and Santa paper vs. Mommy paper etc. I'm not interested in my child asking me a question about the reality of life, and lying to them in a manner which does not help to make my or their life better in any way. If my kids ask me point blank if Santa is real I will ask them what they think. If they say that they think that he isn't real, I will agree with them. He isn't. We can talk about the "Spirit" of Santa, and I will give them background on St. Nicholas, and all the rest, but I am not going to lie to my kids about Santa, simply because Santa is but a tiny, tiny piece of the holiday, and one which I simply refuse to anoint as the whole big important part guy of Christmas. He isn't.

So. We play the whole Santa thing pretty loose and low key around here. And I will say (though I try to stay away from being controversial at all in my blog, against every natural impulse that I have towards strong opinions, sometimes I fail.....but that is okay, because it is my blog, after all) that I find the whole "Elf on the Shelf" thing totally weird and strange and counter to how I parent (I don't care how other people parent, and if it works for you, huzzah I'm all for it, for you). I have never threatened to call Santa (he isn't real). I have never threatened my children to behave or else they may not get presents. Why? Because they WILL get presents, of course! And because I don't believe in making threats, overt or subtle, which I am not willing to follow through on (other than to my non verbal kids, like when I tell Jake he better cut this damn tooth or I am going to give him to the Gypsies. I won't, I don't even know any Gypsies, but Jake does not know English yet, and sometimes it makes me feel better to make outrageous statements to his drooly big eyed face when I am feeling frustrated). The verbal kids? I really, really strive for consistency and follow through with them. To me, the Elf on the Shelf is no different than inviting a totally scary sniper tattle tale of a person into the house in order to scare my children into behaving solely for the purpose of receiving gifts. As stated, my kids are generally decent-ish kids who are going to get presents because we love them and like to share things with them, NOT because their behavior was brought into line with a scary all knowing tattle tale sort of dude-who-is-watching-you-from-a-shelf.

Anyway, for some reason that Elf inspires strong feelings in me. Maybe I'm scared of the very idea of someone watching me 24/7 to see if I have been good or not, and I'm projecting it onto this Elf. Don't know. Forgive me.

So! We had a great party last night, our third annual playgroup Christmas party. Santa came! He even handed out wrapped presents to each child (a coloring book). Luke ~ the mayor ~ hopped up on his lap. Jules made me walk over with her, and she stood next to Santa. He asked her what she wanted. She said "A Dollhouse" (we brainwash them subtly into wanting what we got them, of course). Santa handed her her thin, flat wrapped present, which she promptly opened, then cried "MAMA THIS ISN'T A DOLLHOUSE!". Well, duh, kiddo. So I explained that this wasn't really Santa and this wasn't really Christmas and encouraged her to ride this out. She did, and we had a wonderful time with our friends. I cannot believe that it is almost 4 years since I met this wonderful group of women, and I will say that I cannot imagine my life without them, or their sweet children. Meeting random strangers at a nursing mothers group who then turn out to become some of your very best friends over the next 4 years, the addition of many, many more children, and legions of good laughs and tears and memories shared along the road? Now there is some magic that Santa can't hold a candle to.

PS. Jake is getting a whisk this year.

Because I can, that's why.