Big guy stuff

It was a week of firsts.

Luke's first entire week as a potty trained big guy.

His first day of pseudo school (it was actually just a meet the teachers and kids play day at his new school).

His first real haircut (as opposed to his one or two prior mullet shaping experiences).

Thursday morning was our first day at school. It was a very informal thing ~ just the parents and the kids and the teachers for 2 hours at the playground of Luke's school. I admit to being nervous. In fact, I even admit to calling my Mom on our way there and leaving her a voice mail letting her know where we were going ~ and getting teary as I left the message. I KNOW. I KNOW it's just preschool. I KNOW he is just 2.5. I KNOW that it is just two mornings a week. Yet. Yet it still feels so big. Such a mixture of excitement and pride and fear and change. We chose a co-op preschool. Which means a lot of parental involvement, committees, and relationship with the other parents and teachers and kids. I was excited/nervous to meet the other Mom's and kids. I know that I have been a mother for well over 2 years now, but the idea of me (Melissa!) as "The Mom" is still equally thrilling and unsettling. Which is strange ~ I'm hardly a "young mom".....yet in so many ways I still think of myself as a kid. So. We went.

Luke is pretty much the most easy going and independent kid I could imagine. No fear. No separation anxiety. Just a happy go lucky little dude who welcomed a chance to do dangerous fun climbing on new playground equipment surrounded by new kids. There are a total of 10 kids in his class (2 teachers and one parent aide/class)..........which meant 10 Moms standing around the playground. 10 Moms and one Dad, that is, as Nate stopped in on his way to golf to meet the teachers. Being a Mom is like dating again. The same covert sizing up of situations ~ but instead of checking out clothes or ring less fingers it is an attempt to put a kid with a Mom, and a name with a face. Its great to say that we all never judge or make assumptions ~ yet we do, all the time. Glancing around ~ seeing "perfect mom", "mom in full make up", "harried stressed mom", "nervous helicopter mom" etc...... is always just a funny moment. I was thrilled to learn that we have a bunch of great Moms in Luke's preschool. I was instantly enamored by the totally beautiful put together Mom of 5, and then equally impressed by the Mom's of one, and the older Moms, and the younger Moms. It seems like a great mix and I look forward to interacting with and forming friendships with all of them. It was so much fun to watch the kids interact and to recognize that these kids are going to become a huge part of Luke's life over the next year/s. I was really impressed with the teachers ~ they seemed kind and fun and truly interested in simply meeting and understanding the kids and their parents. Luke is in the gender minority ~ 6 girls, 4 boys in his class. He is also in the potty trained minority, being one of two potty trained kids in the class. Our official orientation/meeting with the directors is this coming Thursday, and his official first day of school is on the 15th. The first pic is of Luke and Jules right before we left for school that day. Luke is looking rather Amish with his shaggy hair, and Jules rather put out at the idea of losing her brother for two mornings a week.

To address the Amish look, Luke and I had a date this morning. While Nate and Jules went to Home Depot, Luke and I went to the barber shop. My brave and funny little man sat in the barber chair as though he had been doing it his entire life, and laughed as she cut his hair, exclaiming over and over "It tickles Mama!" as she took the clippers to his head. I can't believe the difference. I can't believe what a little BOY he suddenly is. We continued our post haircut date with a trip to the farmers market and the grocery store ~ between the picture perfect weather and my sweet boys company my heart just felt like bursting with joy. I felt positively overwhelmed with gratitude for the happy little guy by my side.

In other news ~ Julia is no longer just Julia. She is now known as "My Julia", or "My little Julia". If Luke wakes up first from his naps or in the morning, the first thing that he asks is "Where is my little Julia Mama?". Luke seems to think of his sister as part and parcel of himself. Even at the barber shop today when the barber asked him how old he was ~ he said "I'm two, my Julia is one". Jules reciprocates the love ~ and my daughter is apparently French. Her brother (to her) is Louie. Every morning when I go to get her out of her crib the first words out of her mouth are "Where Louie, Mama?".

So. Here we are. Luke is potty trained and starting pre school. Jules will likely never wean, and has decided that itsy bitsy spider is the best song on Earth and hearing it sung 3,000 times a day is insufficient ;). And Louie and Jules are the very best of friends.

Whisper

I am posting this in a whisper, because I know that Murphy's Law of Parenting states that as soon as you speak something wonderful your child is doing out loud, everything tends to go to hell.

Luke wore underwear all day yesterday with nary a single accident. I think that we are well on our way to diaper free living.

Shhhhhhhh.

Hurricane Hunker

The kids are sleeping, and I am about to crawl into bed for one of those luscious cloudy day at the beach naps. The ocean is so rough due to a hurricane offshore that they have closed the ocean to keep swimmers safe, so we are all enjoying a day of rest from the beach.

We had a fantastic first week of vacation. Long days on the sunny beach, 80 degree water, lots of bike rides and runs and big dinners and kids sharing a nap in the stroller for several hours of blissed out peace on the beach every day sort of days. Many sand castles smashed and seagulls chased and waves jumped. We spent one wild night in Wildwood, where I got to watch my two kids ride the rides side my side as they cracked up at everything and anything. Wildwood is like a foreign country, I felt like I should have gotten a stamp in my passport crossing over the bridge from Cape May. My neck still hurts from constant swiveling and gawking and delighted/horrified disbelief at the general sights and sounds. Getting in at 5 and out by 8 seems to be the secret to the entire family having a great time. It was a perfect night.

The kids get worn out from the long days on the beach, Jules slept almost 14 hours last night AFTER both her and Luke took a 4 hour nap yesterday afternoon. We took them crabbing yesterday morning and it was awesome to watch them wandering around in the water pulling up our crab traps and delighting in the seaweed and rocks and old nasty rope they found in the water.

We are going to actively give the whole potty training thing a go with Luke this week. He is accident free when allowed to roam the world naked.....but I think that underwear feels too much like his cloth diapers, and he has accidents while in underwear. So, we are going to just give it a go, starting this morning. We will see. The idea of him starting preschool potty trained is very appealing to me. Anyone with tips feel free to comment, or email or call me or just send me xanax or something. You know me, two hours and three pairs of underwear into it and I was already frustrated ;) Luckily Mom is here to keep me calm and to reassure me that a kid who can use the potty without accidents all day long is, indeed, ready to potty train. Wish us luck. No pictures until I get home as my laptop had a very expensive accident which will.not.be.talked.about.

#1 does #2

This is (in actuality) Luke playing at the Please Touch Museum.

This is (in my mind) Luke dying with shame one day when he reads how his Mom posted about his potty news on the interwebz.

Luke did the much mistrusted deed in the potty tonight for the first time. Un-bribed, un-pushed, un-forced, un-waited out. We have been very intentionally laid back on the whole potty learning thing...........and tonight, out of nowhere, Luke decided to do something entirely new. He has been diaper free during the day at home for a while now......but had been asking for a diaper when it was time to go stand in a corner and take care of business. Who knows just where we will go from here, but this was a big day round these parts.

Much celebrating was had in the form of some strawberry sorbet.

We are one step closer to only having one in diapers! Go Luke!

And just 'cause

Underwear are so cool.

We are headed to DC for the next 3 days. Peace out.

Diego Drama

So. Luke seems to be wanting to potty train. I decided that rather than have him running around naked all day, we could create some excitement and go buy Luke some underwear. I mentioned that perhaps we could get some Diego underwear. Of course, Luke went CRAZY with this idea and was talking about his "Diego Unwear" all morning. I sweated the entire ride to Target ~ having never underwear shopped for a toddler, I had no idea if I would actually be able to procure Diego underwear. I had to ask three people to even find the kids underwear section, and when I did I immediately saw Diego's smiling face adorning a three pack of underwear. I never imagined that seeing a little cartoon character frolicking with a football on some tighty whities could so relieve and thrill me. Luke carefully selected three three packs (Spider man (which I thought funny as he has no idea who Spidey is), Diego, and Mickey Mouse). As I shopped with my two happily chatting toddlers, I had a flashback to one of my previous trips to Target. (I hardly ever go there, it overwhelms me, so my bi-annual trips always seem to be for some significant purpose). I was 39 weeks pregnant with Luke, on maternity leave, and bored. It hit me that I would need some "supplies" for the post partum birth joys. I waddled around Target, and spent about 30 minutes in the feminine hygiene aisle. I had no idea what to buy. I had never done this before. I was not familiar with the products, with what I would need, with what I should get. I had that 39 week pregnancy brain, making a decision seemed paralyzingly difficult. All around me harried Moms were pushing/pulling/dragging children around the store ~ all of whom seemed to be miserable. I had this one moment of sheer PANIC. Like, lose my breath type panic. I felt trapped. I felt like my brain didn't work, and likely would never work again and like I was facing years of wandering around Target with the look of a caged, cornered animal as I wrestled my impossible children into submission. I left the store, called my best friend (the mother of two small kids) in tears, asking her if this was all horrible and I was surely facing the end of life with the soon to be arriving baby. I asked her if I was going to die a slow sure death of Target shopping motherhood misery. She reassured me that life was not about to end. Anyway, 2.5 years later, the trip was actually fun. The kids were great, we picked out underwear, and my short term panic is something that I can just look back at and laugh at.

We got home and Luke immediately needed to try on his underwear. Each pair, in succession. He then determined that "Luke do dat" and insisted on putting on his own underwear. He frequently put both legs in one leg hole, and shimmied the underwear as far up his legs as he could. He then said ~ "Mama, HELP!" when he realized that he could not walk. Underwear went from thrilling to annoying to me in a space of about 15 minutes.

Tonight I put him to bed and went downstairs. About 10 minutes later he was crying and calling me, which never happens. I ran upstairs, and he told me he had to poop. Golf ball (puck is out and golf balls (2) in this week) in hand, I got him up on the toilet and sat down on the tub so that we could have a chat. I was thinking that getting his mind on something else might distract him and he would poop. He pee'd, we chatted about the Dog, and I heard a splash. I have to admit that I jumped up excitedly to peer into the toilet ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ only to see a golf ball in the toilet. No poop. "Oh Jeez" Luke said, as he looked up at me. Something overcame me. I don't know what happened. I blurted out, "Luke, can you poop on the golf ball?" ~ I don't know where that idea came from. Somewhere deep in the weird illogical part of my brain I was thinking that it might encourage him to go. Luke looked up at me, his eyes HUGE, and said "NO Mama! No go poop on Luke's golf ball!". I felt as though I had just asked a Priest to defile a Bible. I felt terrible. I had just asked my child to poop on his favorite thing in life. I started cracking up at the inanity of it all. One slatted spoon and some bleach later, Luke and his freshly cleaned golf ball were back in bed.

So. El Potty

*For all those sensitive to bodily functions, the following post will likely contain several graphic references to those actions which pertain to bathroom use, most likely housed within horrid child appropriate phrases like "poop" and "pee pee". Should you not like to read about such things, skip this post. As much as I love these kids, I avidly look forward to a time when my vernacular no longer contains words like that as mainstays.

Okay. Disclaimer aside, I just tried typing out a first sentence and I was immediately disgusted while actually typing out the word "pee pee". Here's the facts. I say "pee pee" and "poop" all day long. As my kids are now asleep and I am officially in adult mode, I shall refrain from using those terms, and simply use #1 and #2. You all know which number refers to which action, I presume.

Luke has been doing #1 in the potty since he was about 19 months old. He so gets it. #2 however? Not so much. He gets it, and if he is naked, and needs to do #2, he will actually ask me for a diaper. I will offer the potty, he will say no, and so I will put a diaper on him, and within minutes he will come running up to me saying "Mommy Luke did #2 (sic)". Today I awoke to thunderstorms, and rain, and dark, and I had about 257 things to do around the house, so I decided that we would stay inside today. On a whim, I decided to leave Luke naked as he got out of the tub. I know nothing about potty training, other than that at some point in my own life, I did it. I thought about reading up on it, actually went so far as to check out a potty training book from the library, and returned it, unopened, 3 weeks later. Like most things in my mothering career, I think that I am going to wing it.

Luke did not have a single accident all day today. He wore a diaper to nap, and that's it. I don't know what to do from here. It seems that he "gets it". He tells me when he needs to go (#1) and goes. Thing is, #2? Won't do it on the potty. Today post nap he went running over to his potty saying "Mama Luke #2" as he unsnapped his diaper and went to sit on the potty. His diaper contained a, well, a large bit of #2. He then went a little tiny bit on the potty. Progress? He also ran around naked or just with a shirt on all day long today. We have playgroup at our house tomorrow, and I would feel rather strange having my kid running around commando with all of the other, (clothed!) children. I guess I will just put him in his diapers. Is that confusing to him? Garh. I figure that like most things in life, when something is ready to/meant to happen, it will. Is Luke ready to potty train (I believe that potty learning is today's cool progressive catchphrase du jour........whatever)

I have to say, that one of the most hilarious things about today was watching Jules watch Luke use the potty. She literally squats down in front of him, while clapping and yelling "Yay!". Not kidding. It seems that Luke has no issues with stage fright, as he performs with perfection in front of a crowd.

Jules is a kid. She walks around all day talking. "Hi Da Da" is far and away her favorite phrase. The other hits on the soundtrack of my life include "get down", "have that have that have thaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaat! (generally said in a fishwife-ish shrieking manner), "all done", "have more", "Ma Ma UP", "Dog Ruff Ruff Ruff" and others. I am totally flabbergasted by this child and her vocabulary. Her enunciation of many words is better than Luke's. She says "Aunt Becca" just like that, rather than "Aunt Ecka" like Luke does. Her personality is just coming on strong these days. Jules, at 14.5 months, you are a riot. You are literally the most snuggly baby I could possibly imagine. I pick you up and you wrap your legs around me, throw your arms around my neck, and lay your head on my shoulder. You make your love so known. You would probably crawl back inside of my body, were it possible. You have a clear knowledge of what you want, and a clear ability to communicate that want, much to my joy and (I was going to write occasional, but frequent is more honest) frustration. You watch everything. The cadence of your speech is a clear copyright violation of Luke's. You say exactly what he says, exactly like he says it (think, dip dip dip). You are the funniest little eater, eating everything placed in front of you with a seriousness that I just adore. You eat every veggie and fruit known to man, with the exception of blueberries, which you bite, remove from your mouth, and throw on the floor as you say "no no no". I cannot fathom how you don't like blueberries, but, you don't. As soon as you are done your meal, (literally while you are still chewing your last bite) you will start saying "all done all done all done" while ripping off your bib, dangling it over he floor, watching me watching you dangle your bib, and then you say "No no noooooooo" while wagging your finger. If I don't get to you soon enough, you drop your bib on the floor. Very effective technique, sweet thing.

Anyway. That's where we are. I am sitting in bed writing this courtesy of the new laptop that Nate surprised me with for my birthday. I feel very SJP/Carrie, minus the single life, the cigarette, the NYC apartment, the mole, and the talent.

No Pee Pee in Julia's Eye.

We have bid adieu to the potty seat. We actually have three potty seats, two that are hand me downs and one that I bought. Two are being used as step stools (they have lids which turn them into stools, very convenient for hand washing and climbing up onto the toilet), and one is being used as a toy. In some sick twist, it has become a (bleached, cleaned) toy. It was a hand me down from our friends Kate and Tom, and sings, lights up, flushes, and pretty much does everything but cook dinner. Amidst a playroom full of toys, that potty is the toy of the week around here. I wake up with the "Toi-let paper, toi-let paper, on a ROLL! On a ROLL!" song running through my head all night long. Nothing quite so bizarrely sweet as watching your two kids play together around the glow of the plastic singing potty.


Luke climbs up on the toilet himself most of the time ~ insisting, "LUKE DO DAT!" the whole way, and uses it (seated)......then winds his naked, winter pale way down from the toilet, insisting "Luke DO DAT!". This makes for a lot of naked time in our house every morning and evening. It all started off a few weeks ago when Luke pee'd on the floor. "No pee pee on the floor, Luke" said I. Luke took that idea and ran with it. In the course of the last 12 hours here is a (literal) list of the places Luke has told me (in no uncertain terms) that he is NOT supposed to pee pee.

*No pee pee in the bath!
*No pee pee on the bubbles!
*No pee pee on Mama's shirt!
*No pee pee on Julia's towel!
*No pee pee in Julia's EYE! (he has taken the "don't touch the babies eye" thing to a new level with his insistence that no one, EVER, pee pee in the babies eye)
*No pee pee on Panda Bear! (the book of the week)
*No pee pee on the dog!
*No pee pee on the toothbrush!

So there you have it, folks. Luke's definitive list of places NOT to pee pee.

Something bad

Happened today. I distinctly remember the first time I caught Luke with dog food in his mouth as a crawling baby. I was disgusted, but pretty much figured it had happened before to other kids, and would likely happen again.

It did. Several times.

After a month or three of redirection and intervention, Luke lost interest in the dog food. However, when Julia was 6 months old and started crawling immediately and directly towards the dog food whenever she was placed on the ground, Luke rediscovered the guilty pleasure of the dog food bowl. The worst was the day that I found the two of them sitting together giggling over their dog food indulgence. I was, again, disgusted, and again wrote it off to the fact that this was the sort of thing that Mom's of such closely spaced sibs had surely encountered before. I do my best to be diligent, but with a dog who prefers to eat his dog food off of the floor rather than his bowl, it can be an issue.

Then came today. Luke was still downstairs eating his oatmeal with Nate. I was rushing to get out of the house with both kids by 9 for playgroup. I took Jules upstairs, closed the gate so that she couldn't get to the steps, and started pulling out clothes and diapers for both kids. Julia usually plays in the laundry room while I do that, and I assumed that with her not underfoot, that was where she was. I got caught up putting away clean folded clothes, and realized that I had not heard from her for a minute or two.

Poked my head in the laundry room ~ no Jules.

Julia Elise, my sweet little almost 11 month old daughter had somehow found one of the two doors leading into the bathroom not latched, and was gleefully playing in Luke's potty. Skeevy, right?

That's when I realized that whichever parent was around for Luke's last potty (the morning before) had not emptied the potty. (it was me).

I feel so guilty I may eat some dog food.