When Mama is away.........

The kids will play.

With powder, apparently.

I unexpectedly spent the day in the hospital yesterday (I'm fine). Nate was in charge of the kids as family was out of town, our sitters out of pocket, and we didn't imagine that it would turn into the all day event that it did, so we didn't want to bother friends.

Being a stay at home Dad (even if it's for less than a full day) is hard.

Lesson learned.


:)

Toddler Travel

So. Our first hotel stay with two toddlers.

We started the hotel experience early on, Luke was about 7 weeks old when we took him down to Norfolk for a Rugby tournament. We did the travel while pregnant and with a baby thing. We did the travel with a baby and a toddler thing.

Now? Two toddlers. I was apprehensive.

I was nervous about the sleeping thing. Luke is in a bed, and Julia in a crib. Gone are the easy days of co-sleeping. We got two attached rooms ~ One for the kids and one for us. Jules goes to bed at 7 and Luke at 7.30. I didn't know how it was going to go with not being able to read to Luke in his bed like we do at home. I just could not picture it all. Motherhood is SUCH a constant learning process. Just when you think that you have things "figured out" things change.

We left on Wed, right at nap time, and the kids slept the entire way down. We took them to Nate's office to see everyone, then on to the hotel where we hit the pool. The pool was the other thing that I had worried about. Traditional lap pool type pools are impossible for me right now alone with the kids. I didn't realize that Landsowne had put in a whole new pool area, with several pools, and even a part with a beach like entrance, that was pure heaven. We fed the kids dinner at the pool, took a walk, and then went up. Got cleaned up and ready for bed and I put down Jules while one of Nate's coworkers arrived to babysit for us while we went out with friends. We came home and Luke was in his bed sound asleep, and both kids slept till well past seven. Again, heaven.

Restaurants have gotten fun these days. Still busy, but fun now as Luke is fully conversational and Jules chimes in with her funny little asides throughout the meal. Way more food goes in their mouths than on the floor. They have become little PEOPLE all of a sudden. THey say please, and thank you, and generally amaze me with how much fun they are. Nate and I kept looking at one another with a bit of astonishment at how generally easy and truly fun it all was. Its nice to step outside of the routine of home and to get to watch your kids experience new things. Its nice to feel as though the hard work of parenting does pay off when you sit around the table as a family laughing your ass off at how cute your kids are being.

Thursday we had breakfast together, then dropped Nate off at work. THe kids and I hit the pool again until noon, when I got them ready for naps, and me ready for golf. I put Jules down as Nate and our friend Sarah showed up ~ Sarah was kind enough to watch the kids for us while we played. We got in a HOT round on a beautiful course, and then met up with Sarah and the kids so that we could get the kids fed. They had a putting green at the resort ~ and we had brought Luke's putter with us, and the kid went NUTS putting. It was like Luke's version of heaven ~ golf balls and holes everywhere. We repeated the routine of the night before, as Caroline was again watching the kids so that we could have dinner with friends. Again, we came home to find Luke safely tucked into his bed and both kids sleeping away in their room.

Today we repeated the morning routine, visited friends, and then went to a burger place before we started the long trek home. Luke looked like such a little man downing down his burger next to his Daddy. The kids slept the whole way home, and I am utterly exhausted.

Travel with two toddlers, check. I've got it all figured out............. until tomorrow, anyway ;)

And just 'cause

Underwear are so cool.

We are headed to DC for the next 3 days. Peace out.

Ju-Jous

Baby girl, you are 15 month old. You were supposed to have your 15 month well baby visit today, but due to a scheduling mix up at the Dr's office (their fault) and their subsequent admission that the next well baby visit I could schedule was either Friday (when we will be out of town) or in SEPTEMBER, your Mama Bear threw a holy FIT at the Dr's, requested your medical records, and quickly found a new pedi based upon the recommendation of a friend. Your 15 month visit will be next week with our new Dr. Sometimes my temper gets the best of me, and sometimes my temper helps me make the best decisions for my kids. Let it be shouted from the rooftops that while I love love loved the Dr's at Kids First WC, and I loved the way that they would get my sick kids in for visits within hours of calling, I have zero tolerance for a practice that makes mistakes (they wrote my appointment time on my appointment card wrong 3 months ago....and I showed up at the time they had written down) and can't find a way to rectify them. I was tempted to include my entire diatribe/fit, but it isn't worth it. (It was pretty good though, if I may pat myself on the back.)

So. Julia Elise.

You funny little bugger. You are a delight. Your language skills are beyond my wildest dreams considering your age. We are still nursing, and you are officially that baby who asks to nurse. I know some people love to say the whole "when they are old enough to ask for it, they are too old to nurse" thing, and I find that silly. You loooooove your big brother. Every morning when I come in to get you you look at me, start bouncing up and down in your crib, and say "Luuuuke?" as you point downstairs. On the mornings when he wakes up first, and he hears you cry, he says "Mama, Julja crying! Mama, go get Julja!". He insists on opening your door, runs over to your crib, climbs in, and the two of you say "I love yoooooooouuuuuuuu" while pointing to one anothers noses and giggling like mad. Its mindmeltingly cute. I have to get it on video, then learn to upload video. Baby steps towards becoming tech savvy.

Your personality just shines through lately. You love to be held. You wrap your legs around my body, your arms around my neck, and cuddle your head right into my shoulder the moment I pick you up. You do everything Luke does. Today at the playground you climbed UP the slide for the first time, hot on your brothers heels. Your eating is epic. You could easily sit for 30 minutes in your highchair, happily and methodically eating every random thing that I put on your plate. Your new favorite word is "Duuuuuuuuude!", immediately after which you yell "Touchdown!" as you throw your arms up in the air. You have already gotten on board with your brothers golf ball obsession. You love to kick, and throw, and hit balls, and you also can't seem to stop yourself from kissing every.single.stuffed.animal.or.babydoll you pick up. You love to "talk" on the phone. You don't call it a phone though, you call it a "hello", which makes me laugh every time. You walk around with the phone, or anything shaped remotely like a phone, saying "hi Da da! Love you Da Da!" and the like.

You know your mind, baby girl. You know what you want, and when you want it. You have a bit more of a temper than your brother does, and I have to admit that sometimes it makes me laugh. You are a bit more dramatic than him. You never hurt yourself. You seem to have a very keen sense of what you are capable of, and you execute it well. When you do get knocked down (as frequently happens at play dates or playgroup as you are usually playing with kids a year older than you) you rarely cry. You are a tough little cookie. Your skin is positively dreamy. You LOVE water. You LOVE eating markers (not just sucking on them, actually eating, chewing and swallowing them ~ BLECH). Your hair is SO blond I cannot believe it. Its like corn silk in the sunlight. You have the sweetest little curls in the back of your mullet. You are a kisser, baby girl, and I feel honored every time you bestow one one me. You could not possibly be an easier sleeper ~ You actually sleep slightly less than Luke ~ You go to bed right at 7 with nothing but a kiss and a prayer. You wake at 7 am happy and ready for action. You go down for your naps with nary a protest.

Happy 15 months Ju-Jous (that is what you call yourself right now). I love you so much.

Obsession and Depression

Luke got his very first set of golf clubs this weekend. It's for 2-5 year olds and has the cutest little golf bag, a putter, driver, and an iron. I have honestly never seen a child as obsessed with something as Luke is with golf and golf balls. That's the obsession part of the post. He had 5 golf balls in his bed this morning. They come to the store, to the park, to playgroup (Where it gets left in a car). There are yellow golf balls, white golf balls, pink ones, wiffle ones. We never used pacifiers. He never had a "lovey". Instead, this, it appears. Its all that he wants to play with when we are outside. He throws, drops, kicks, chases and putts golf balls everywhere and anywhere. I can't wait to figure out how to download video of him hitting it, yelling "Luke hit it in da hole!" after every putt. (there is no hole, but this does not seem to deter Luke). As fun as it is to see him enjoying them, its also pretty (EXTREMELY) annoying to hear "Mama, where Luke golf ball go?" no less than 3,000/day.

That brings me to the depression part of the post. It's been raining. Its been cold. LOTS of raining. The house behind us flooded on Saturday night. There was an unbelievable quantity of water pouring into the house, and several feet of it in the basement. Lots of excitement around here as we cooked dinner and were astonished at our new found waterfront deck.

Bad weather is so annoying when you have to drive in it to work, or not work because of it, or whatever. Bad weather is a special sort of hell to a mother of two toddlers. Its been hard, I've been impatient. The kids seem to be taking annoying pills. Everything is muddy. The kids were wearing SWEATSHIRTS AND JEANS yesterday at play group. It all just feels so wrong. One of my good friends just had a new baby, her 2nd son. I was talking to her on the phone yesterday, and we were talking about things were going, and she said "We forgot how easy a newborn is! How on earth did this seem hard the first time around?". Its so very true. Babies never tested my patience. Babies never said NO. Babies never tried to assert their independence, or color on my walls. Babies never made me honestly have the need to give myself a "time out" before I react to them. Toddlers are just a special sort of hard. Toddlers stuck inside due to pouring rain are pent up balls of destruction just waiting to unleash their touch on every available surface. It's constant chatter (I hear the same phrases over and over all.day.long) its constant mess, and diapers, and food on the floor and reading books and mess and mess and mess. Messy hands, messy faces, dirty feet, sandy bodies, dirty diapers etc etc etc. The weather, and the constant in house mess making, is driving me mad. I desperately need the sun to come out. I love being a Mom. But I would be lying if I didn't admit that after days and days of 1:1 with two toddlers, this job is HARD. Infinitely more rewarding, and infinitely harder than anything that I have ever done.

Naughty Face

#1 Jules making "Look at my beautiful necklace" (aka Luke's pajama bottoms) face.
#2 Jules making "Naughty Face".

More on naughty face, and the momentous weekend, later. I'm beat.

Diego Drama

So. Luke seems to be wanting to potty train. I decided that rather than have him running around naked all day, we could create some excitement and go buy Luke some underwear. I mentioned that perhaps we could get some Diego underwear. Of course, Luke went CRAZY with this idea and was talking about his "Diego Unwear" all morning. I sweated the entire ride to Target ~ having never underwear shopped for a toddler, I had no idea if I would actually be able to procure Diego underwear. I had to ask three people to even find the kids underwear section, and when I did I immediately saw Diego's smiling face adorning a three pack of underwear. I never imagined that seeing a little cartoon character frolicking with a football on some tighty whities could so relieve and thrill me. Luke carefully selected three three packs (Spider man (which I thought funny as he has no idea who Spidey is), Diego, and Mickey Mouse). As I shopped with my two happily chatting toddlers, I had a flashback to one of my previous trips to Target. (I hardly ever go there, it overwhelms me, so my bi-annual trips always seem to be for some significant purpose). I was 39 weeks pregnant with Luke, on maternity leave, and bored. It hit me that I would need some "supplies" for the post partum birth joys. I waddled around Target, and spent about 30 minutes in the feminine hygiene aisle. I had no idea what to buy. I had never done this before. I was not familiar with the products, with what I would need, with what I should get. I had that 39 week pregnancy brain, making a decision seemed paralyzingly difficult. All around me harried Moms were pushing/pulling/dragging children around the store ~ all of whom seemed to be miserable. I had this one moment of sheer PANIC. Like, lose my breath type panic. I felt trapped. I felt like my brain didn't work, and likely would never work again and like I was facing years of wandering around Target with the look of a caged, cornered animal as I wrestled my impossible children into submission. I left the store, called my best friend (the mother of two small kids) in tears, asking her if this was all horrible and I was surely facing the end of life with the soon to be arriving baby. I asked her if I was going to die a slow sure death of Target shopping motherhood misery. She reassured me that life was not about to end. Anyway, 2.5 years later, the trip was actually fun. The kids were great, we picked out underwear, and my short term panic is something that I can just look back at and laugh at.

We got home and Luke immediately needed to try on his underwear. Each pair, in succession. He then determined that "Luke do dat" and insisted on putting on his own underwear. He frequently put both legs in one leg hole, and shimmied the underwear as far up his legs as he could. He then said ~ "Mama, HELP!" when he realized that he could not walk. Underwear went from thrilling to annoying to me in a space of about 15 minutes.

Tonight I put him to bed and went downstairs. About 10 minutes later he was crying and calling me, which never happens. I ran upstairs, and he told me he had to poop. Golf ball (puck is out and golf balls (2) in this week) in hand, I got him up on the toilet and sat down on the tub so that we could have a chat. I was thinking that getting his mind on something else might distract him and he would poop. He pee'd, we chatted about the Dog, and I heard a splash. I have to admit that I jumped up excitedly to peer into the toilet ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ only to see a golf ball in the toilet. No poop. "Oh Jeez" Luke said, as he looked up at me. Something overcame me. I don't know what happened. I blurted out, "Luke, can you poop on the golf ball?" ~ I don't know where that idea came from. Somewhere deep in the weird illogical part of my brain I was thinking that it might encourage him to go. Luke looked up at me, his eyes HUGE, and said "NO Mama! No go poop on Luke's golf ball!". I felt as though I had just asked a Priest to defile a Bible. I felt terrible. I had just asked my child to poop on his favorite thing in life. I started cracking up at the inanity of it all. One slatted spoon and some bleach later, Luke and his freshly cleaned golf ball were back in bed.

So. El Potty

*For all those sensitive to bodily functions, the following post will likely contain several graphic references to those actions which pertain to bathroom use, most likely housed within horrid child appropriate phrases like "poop" and "pee pee". Should you not like to read about such things, skip this post. As much as I love these kids, I avidly look forward to a time when my vernacular no longer contains words like that as mainstays.

Okay. Disclaimer aside, I just tried typing out a first sentence and I was immediately disgusted while actually typing out the word "pee pee". Here's the facts. I say "pee pee" and "poop" all day long. As my kids are now asleep and I am officially in adult mode, I shall refrain from using those terms, and simply use #1 and #2. You all know which number refers to which action, I presume.

Luke has been doing #1 in the potty since he was about 19 months old. He so gets it. #2 however? Not so much. He gets it, and if he is naked, and needs to do #2, he will actually ask me for a diaper. I will offer the potty, he will say no, and so I will put a diaper on him, and within minutes he will come running up to me saying "Mommy Luke did #2 (sic)". Today I awoke to thunderstorms, and rain, and dark, and I had about 257 things to do around the house, so I decided that we would stay inside today. On a whim, I decided to leave Luke naked as he got out of the tub. I know nothing about potty training, other than that at some point in my own life, I did it. I thought about reading up on it, actually went so far as to check out a potty training book from the library, and returned it, unopened, 3 weeks later. Like most things in my mothering career, I think that I am going to wing it.

Luke did not have a single accident all day today. He wore a diaper to nap, and that's it. I don't know what to do from here. It seems that he "gets it". He tells me when he needs to go (#1) and goes. Thing is, #2? Won't do it on the potty. Today post nap he went running over to his potty saying "Mama Luke #2" as he unsnapped his diaper and went to sit on the potty. His diaper contained a, well, a large bit of #2. He then went a little tiny bit on the potty. Progress? He also ran around naked or just with a shirt on all day long today. We have playgroup at our house tomorrow, and I would feel rather strange having my kid running around commando with all of the other, (clothed!) children. I guess I will just put him in his diapers. Is that confusing to him? Garh. I figure that like most things in life, when something is ready to/meant to happen, it will. Is Luke ready to potty train (I believe that potty learning is today's cool progressive catchphrase du jour........whatever)

I have to say, that one of the most hilarious things about today was watching Jules watch Luke use the potty. She literally squats down in front of him, while clapping and yelling "Yay!". Not kidding. It seems that Luke has no issues with stage fright, as he performs with perfection in front of a crowd.

Jules is a kid. She walks around all day talking. "Hi Da Da" is far and away her favorite phrase. The other hits on the soundtrack of my life include "get down", "have that have that have thaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaat! (generally said in a fishwife-ish shrieking manner), "all done", "have more", "Ma Ma UP", "Dog Ruff Ruff Ruff" and others. I am totally flabbergasted by this child and her vocabulary. Her enunciation of many words is better than Luke's. She says "Aunt Becca" just like that, rather than "Aunt Ecka" like Luke does. Her personality is just coming on strong these days. Jules, at 14.5 months, you are a riot. You are literally the most snuggly baby I could possibly imagine. I pick you up and you wrap your legs around me, throw your arms around my neck, and lay your head on my shoulder. You make your love so known. You would probably crawl back inside of my body, were it possible. You have a clear knowledge of what you want, and a clear ability to communicate that want, much to my joy and (I was going to write occasional, but frequent is more honest) frustration. You watch everything. The cadence of your speech is a clear copyright violation of Luke's. You say exactly what he says, exactly like he says it (think, dip dip dip). You are the funniest little eater, eating everything placed in front of you with a seriousness that I just adore. You eat every veggie and fruit known to man, with the exception of blueberries, which you bite, remove from your mouth, and throw on the floor as you say "no no no". I cannot fathom how you don't like blueberries, but, you don't. As soon as you are done your meal, (literally while you are still chewing your last bite) you will start saying "all done all done all done" while ripping off your bib, dangling it over he floor, watching me watching you dangle your bib, and then you say "No no noooooooo" while wagging your finger. If I don't get to you soon enough, you drop your bib on the floor. Very effective technique, sweet thing.

Anyway. That's where we are. I am sitting in bed writing this courtesy of the new laptop that Nate surprised me with for my birthday. I feel very SJP/Carrie, minus the single life, the cigarette, the NYC apartment, the mole, and the talent.

What else could I possibly add?

This pretty much sums up the weekend.

Dip Dip Dip

This afternoon I was sitting in the office nursing Jules and poking around on the computer. Luke was still napping. I heard a weird noise in the kitchen. A squeal sort of noise. I ran in there, to find my Luke, sitting up at the island with his hockey puck, balsamic vinegar running down his face, dip dip dipping bread and cheese into balsamic vinegar and pesto and tomatoes with gleeful abandon. He must have walked downstairs, and had his balsamic radar go off, climbed up on the high stool, and sat himself down for a meal. I have no idea how long he was there. He ate about half of my giant afternoon late lunch meal/snack before I caught him. If you can't beat 'em, join 'em, so Jules and I helped him polish off the rest of my meal.

If you notice in the pic there is a hockey puck on the island. Some kids use pacifiers. Some have blankets, or teddy bears, or whatever. Luke has a hockey puck. He sleeps with it. A while ago it was the basketball. Then golf balls. Now puck. Night Night Luke, Night Night puck. Two nights ago he asked me to give the puck a kiss goodnight. We are deep in the throes of another passionate new obsession. It's actually quite annoying how obsessed with golf Luke is. Every.single.time I get him out of the car in our garage we start a golfball/club begging match. He catches a glimpse of my clubs sitting there, and starts begging to play with them. Every single time its time to go inside its a heartbroken little drama as he is told that the (real) golfballs have to stay outside (he has hollow ones for inside, but never seems to remember that in his moment of heartbreak). I hear "Mama, where golfball go?" ~ honestly? ~ 200ish times a day. I have decided that it's time to get the kid some kids clubs. We have broken two sets of el cheapo plastic kid golf clubs, and I refuse to waste more money on those garbage things again. So, I'm in the hunt for toddler/kid golf clubs, if anyone has any recomendations or experience please let me know.

Jules has just come to life lately. Thats her "cleaning" above. Whenever she can she will swipe a wipe, and she and Luke will go on feverish "cleaning" binges around the house. She is just hilarious all of a sudden. She is talking so much, she is so interactive and funny, she loves to dance, and today she beat up Luke for the very first time (:/). Today was their first official "fight". We were reading books on the couch while our oatmeal cooked early this morning. Luke had a book that Julia decided that she wanted. She GRABBED it out of his hands while yelling "Me me me me me me meeeeeeeeeee". He resisted, and held onto the book, while saying "No, Julia". She took offense, I presume, as she then reached up, grabbed a fistfull of his hair, and pulled ~ hard ~ until he started crying and dropped the book. It was literally the first time I have ever seen any agression from her towards him. It both made me laugh (secretely, of course) and made me furious. Little Sumo, Julia Elise.

We head to the beach in a few hours. Luke has been talking about it all week. "Luke go Cape May. Luke catch big fish with Pop Pop Uncle Pete". Have a great weekend everyone.

Farmin

So. It's been a long day.

We started out at 8 am, (Poor Nate started out at 4 am en route to the airport) to head to Becca's school. We had a great time with the kids, and Luke stood up in front of a class of high schoolers, grabbed his Aunt's hand, and started doing his little side to side dance as he sang the alphabet to them. I was grossly, unduly, proud of my brave little guy. It took his Mama 33 years and two kids to be so comfortable singing in public. It was so much fun. Thanks, Bec.

It was 11 by the time that we were done answering the childhood development questions of two classes of teens and following up on our September visit. Rather than ruin nap time pre lunch, we decided to head to a store that I had been getting emails from for about a year. I had a coupon, and they had announced a "huge sale", so we took a jaunt to check it out. It was a lovely store. The sort of place that I would have just eaten up pre children and pre one income and pre reality of life with actual dirt eating, food messing, bug hunting, toilet water splashing children. I put my foot in my mouth when one of my girlfriends called me to see what I was doing and I answered "Oh, just shopping in some grotesquely overpriced kids store"................ and then went to check out my two measly items with my measly little coupon, and had the owner say to me "I am sorry that you think that our store is overpriced, I try hard to be competitive". Foot. Mouth. Oops.

It was one of those moments in life where I actually was so NOT trying to hurt someones feelings, or call them out, but was just candidly (and I thought quietly) being honest. I went on to tell the now-I-know-is-the-owner that I knew it was not her fault, but the fault of the manufacturers of the children's clothing lines that she carried, and how my two and one year olds trash clothing in various almost incomprehensible ways, and how I love the clothes but simply cannot justify the cost(one dress that I thought was cute was $120....for my one year old. Um, no). We went on to have a lovely discussion about cloth diapers, and I am thrilled with the two small products that I did buy, but man was it awkward there for a moment. She was a lovely woman with a lovely store, and I totally probably made her feel bad, and it made me feel bad. Argh.

Pre me feeling bad, I was perusing the counter and found the business cards of several local businesspeople. I have to tell you that I was awed. There were maybe 6 business cards there. In no particular order:

*One for a babyproofer. Because, you know, you will very likely kill your child DEAD if you don't have someone professionally prepare your home for your own offspring. First thought: they are CHILDREN, not anacondas. Is it really that hard???? Second thought. No, there was no second thought. Mind was getting numbingly blurry.

*One for a professional errand runner. Because, you know, why should you have to bother getting your own sushi, or your own dry cleaning, or your own snowshoes/baby diapers/jewelery cleaning/whatever when you don't have to? Only $30/hour on weekends or early or late errands. What a steal.

*This was the one that really got me. One for a "baby concierge". I had no idea what that meant (in all honesty, I had no idea what any of them fully meant, so of course I grabbed their cards and went to their websites). I came to learn that a "baby concierge" is someone who will come and tell you how to be pregnant, and how to have a baby. They will actually "craft" your baby registry for you, and plan your nursery, and pretty much do everything but actually gestate your child. Now. Call me a cynic......but. I try not to be judgemental on my blog. I try not to even pretend to give other people mothering advice, or whatever. I just try to write about my kids. BUT. This one made me want to throw all that out the window. You know why? Because if you can't:

A. Talk to your friends, research on line, read some books on what a baby might need, than it is possible, QUITE possible, that you are not intelligent enough to actually raise a child.

OR

B. If you are too BUSY to talk to your friends research on line read some books etc on what a baby might need, you may just be too busy to have a child.

So. We went to lunch after that. It was just one of those perfect days where the sky was so blue, the breeze so fresh, and my kids being so edible and endearing, that I did not want it to end.

After naps we headed out amongst a whole nother set of folk. Those less concerned with purchasing $110 organic baby snuzzly blankets shipped in from another country, and those more concerned with actually bettering their own backyard via supporting local organic farms (do I sound judgemental? I just read back through this and it sounds judgemental. Forgive me. Maybe I am judgemental about this. Or maybe I am just a busy Mom living a real life. I can't decipher which it is). Mom Mom came along for the ride, as she was excited to see the farm. We picked peas (which we then consumed, feverishly, with dinner), got our food, and our pastured meat and eggs, and came home. I bathed my decidedly filthy children, and watered the plants, and here I am.

If only my baby concierge could come mop my floors for me, then give me a bath, then tuck me in bed.

Or is that more errand runner territory?

Maybe I should just call for a personal yoga lesson and chill-the-heck-out.

(As a disclaimer, as an ardent Capitalist, I think that it is totally fantastic that these people are doing these things. I wish them great success, even if I do not understand a bit of it.)

(As another aside, when I spell checked this post, my spell check cried foul at my use of babyproofer. It suggested just one term as a conceivable alternative : bombproofer. It is worthy of consideration that spell check is wiser than it seems, at times.)