"My Julia"

Jules was two in March. Two going on twelve.

Last night I took the kids to a free concert at rosetree park. It was either brave or stupid, but Nate had been away for a few days and the idea came up at playgroup that morning and I could not resist the idea of happily killing our post nap pre bed hours. We talked a lot about what a "concert" was, and I told the kids that it meant a lot of dancing would ensue.

We got there, set up our blanket as our friends were not there yet, and the kids started dancing. My kids seem to have a touch of the whirling dervish in them, as dancing meant spinning in circles long before the music started. Of her own volition, Jules apparently felt inspired to launch into her own sort of yogic asanas, with this photographic series as the result.

Oh how I love my yogic kidlets.

It was hot but fun, though I admit to the late bedtime being a bit of a bear without Nate here to help. Having fun is so exhausting to we Mama's.

Jake had his two month visit today, where we discovered that at 16 lbs 13 oz he is the size of an average 9 month old. That explains the clothing sizes. The Dr. actually laughed when he saw him and called him a "fat little Budda". He took his shots like a champ and showed no ill effects. Perhaps this weight was the one that he needed to hit in order to adjust his sleeping as the past few nights he has gone 6 or 7 hours without eating......perhaps. I am loathe to even write that his sleeping has improved as that generally curses me.....but I will roll the dice on that one.

2 Months

Jake is two months old as of today. His 2 month pedi visit is on thursday, I can't wait to find out how much he weighs, though I am dreading his first round of shots. I really can't believe that it is only two months since he was born, honestly, I feel like our round little jolly man has been with us much longer, somehow. His sleep is starting to improve as he eats a little less ~ He goes to bed sometime between 7 and 8 and generally sleeps till around 1.30. Nurses and goes right back down....and then we repeat that around 4, again at 5.30 in my bed, where he tends to remain until about 8 am. Not too bad, though not spectacular, either. The good news is that there is no fussing ~ He eats, then returns immediately to sleep. His smile is infectious ~ he smiles with his whole face, not just his mouth. His throaty little chuckle makes me laugh out loud, and he uses it most often when his sibs are playing with him. They are infatuated with "their baby Jake" ~ if he ever starts to fuss either Luke or Jules runs to his side and starts singing him a song. He rolls from his belly to his back and is just about rolling from back to belly....he seems to get almost there and then realize that he does not want to be on his belly :). He has been great in kids zone and I have not had to leave class yet to come get him, which I feel endlessly grateful for. I was missing exercise terribly, and feel rejuvenated to be working out again. The effect of exercise on my patience is measurable. I wish that I could just freeze him at this age ~ I love him. Jake, you make our family feel so complete with your joyful little countenance. Thanks, Buddy. Delivering you was a real doozie, but you really were worth it.

This week is hectic as we visit with friends and try to get our act together before we head down to Cape May for two weeks. Nate is away almost all week and Brooke is off on vacation this week, so I'm keeping us busy playing with friends and going to the pool so that we don't get too overtly sick of one another (i.e so I don't lose my mind).

My date with Jake.

I drink my morning coffee while admiring his fuzzy little body in the sun.

We sit and converse in the afternoon.

Seriously, Lady? More pictures? Enough already.

I am spending a weekend alone with my sweet boy ~ and I feel like a first time Mama again. I haven't stopped kissing him, admiring his sweet rolls, and reveling in the luxury of not adhering to anyones schedule other than my own.

I feel intoxicated by him. I had so missed having time to just lay around and breath him in, to watch him change right in front of my eyes, to just wrap myself up in the sweetness that only a newborn encapsulates. I miss Luke and Jules terribly, but am amazed at how much I needed this time with my Jake, and didn't even know it.

This newborn stage goes by much, much too fast. Jake is most likely my last baby. I remind myself of that when we are on our third or fourth nursing session of the night.....that this is but a phase, a very very short phase. I honestly am treasuring my quiet time in the middle of the night where I can just look down at this baby who I waited so long to meet and feel my soul be happy. I hoard him and just try to soak in all of the sweet neediness that is Jake at 8 weeks old. I can still fix all of his problems. I am what he craves and needs. I love this newborn thing. Love it.

No pictures.

We had an event today.

It was a great day. Nate left before dawn for DC. I got up at 7 with Jake and Luke and Jules showed her face around 7:40. Some good breakfast. Cleaned up. Nursed. The getting 3 kids dressed insanity. Got to preschool with perfect timing so that both kids got dropped off at once. Sped to the gym with Jake asleep in his seat. A fantastic boxing class, followed by a 5K. Got Jake. Ran a quick errand. Picked up kids. Had a great lunch. Put the kids (including Jake) to bed. Got the birthday party invites done and addressed and in the mailbox. Played on the Internet. Cleaned the downstairs. Set up the Valentines day card making table so that the kids would be excited when they woke up (side note, I abhor Valentines day and had completely forgotten about it until Luke's teacher called to tell me about the soon upcoming party since class had been cancelled for the eleventyith time this year due to snow. Then decided in a fit of insanity to undertake hand making our Valentines this year). Heard Jake awake, so I scooped him up and took him into my bathroom while I took a shower. Was feeling fierce and strong and organized. Was feeling together, and on top of things, and......well.......good. The Universe, however, was laughing.

Jake happily climbed around and laughed at me as I showered. He marveled at me throwing bubbles and water against the glass shower wall. I was so excited to put on my pajamas and get on with a lovely cold afternoon of Valentine making and dinner cooking and being with my kids.

Just as I was getting out of the shower Luke and Jules came into my bathroom, fresh out of naps. It was about 3:45. I greeted them with joy as I dried off. They were so excited to do their valentines. Jules said "Mama! I have paint on my arm from my owl!"

Kind, together Mom said "What do you mean Jules? Do you mean from school?"

"No Mama, from my owl! From my owl in my room!".

Segue. Julia has/had one of those wall decals in her room right above her bed. It was an owl, with some flowers, sitting on a branch. About a week ago, I realized that the branch was gone. Some sleuthing showed a million brown decal strips carefully peeled off behind Julia's headboard. A serious conversation followed.....one which entailed threats, and guilt, and encouragement to never again touch things on one's wall. In the interim, my Mom, knowing how unlikely it was that I would remediate the missing branch situation, brought me some acrylic paint (to recreate the branch) and some small paintbrushes. To incent myself to do it, I put them on Julia's dresser ~ way far back where she could not reach them ~ in her room. End segue.

I said ~ "Jules, NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" as I ran to her room. I got there. Jake and Luke were hot on my heels, sensing drama. I saw two giant brown paint puddles on her (white carpeted) floor, and paint all over her (white) dresser, and all over the clothes that were in the drawer. My mind raced as I reconstructed the scene. *Impulsive child opened drawer. Said child climbed on drawer to reach paint. Little fingers somehow unscrewed the paint lid (previously unopened). Paint everywhere".

I screamed again. All visions of being all together fell by the wayside. JULIA! WHY DID YOU DO THIS? WHAT THE HECK? WHY DID YOU TOUCH THE PAINT? I ran to get the carpet cleaner and scrub brush, which were in my room due to a recent incident. I started scrubbing. Jake was crawling into everything. I set the gate. Jules was crying in my room. Jake was trying to get into the caustic chemicals that entail carper cleaner. Luke was saying "Mom? Why did Julia do that? I love you Mom! I would never paint on my carpet, Mom" and other total ass kissing type things, which almost made me giggle, but for my rage. I cleaned the brush, I cleaned the carpet, I scrubbed the dresser. I moved the baby, I went back to Julia, ready to admonish her.

Just as I got back to her, I heard a little boy voice pipe in ~ "But MOM, what about the wall?"

WHAT WALL LUKE? (said mean Mommy)

THE WALL WITH THE PAINT ON IT?! (said 3 year old Luke)

I ran back down the hall. I saw "the wall". My towel fell off. I think I screamed. There was brown paint all over the wall that originally housed a lovely owl, branch, flower decal thingy. All. Over.It.

And because in order to get to the wall, one small paint laden child had to climb over the bed, there was paint All. Over. The. Freaking.Pottery.Barn.Quilt. All over it.

Screamed.

Ran downstairs. Grabbed Magic eraser, clothes, vinegar, baking soda, scrub brushes, towels. Briefly looked up and realized that I was naked. Felt shame that was overcome by rage. Ran back upstairs. Threw the quilt into the washing machine. Stood on bed, scrubbing at a good 3 foot wide and tall area of paint. Realized I was naked, again. Realized I was sweating. Remembered that about 6 minutes ago I was in the shower, feeling on top of the world.

Have a new appreciation for the way that in all of 2 minutes, one can go from feeling really on top of things, to being lost without a compass.

My Mom is home today with a stomach bug. As I could not reach Nate, I called her. She was belly laughing. Then she said ~ "Did you get a picture?"....and I cringed. I have pictures of blow out epic poops. I have pictures of snotty crusty eyed kids. I have pictures of crying babies, and of dropped Popsicles, and of all sorts of other heartbreaks. I actually thought about taking a picture of this.....but then realized that I don't want a picture reminding me of my rage. I hate rage. And I felt it today. Being a Mom is hard. Really hard. I love it, I would never, ever change it, but this work is hard. Today I lost the battle.

The stupid Valentines got made. By tomorrow, I might laugh at the image of my naked self insanely scrubbing the wall. But tonight? Well, not tonight. Tonight I have to go finish the kids Valentines, because I told them that the glitter paint was broken :) Know why? Because I have had enough freaking painty messes for today. And know why else? Because right now I believe that glitter paint may just be good for me and my angst.

Who's who?

Big boys

Luke is loving the classes at ACAC. The first pic is my sweet son, with his food necklace that he made at cooking class Monday night. The kids love to cook with me ~ they crack the eggs, they mix the food, they love to put the goodies that I chop up into salads or spread their peanut butter onto their bread. So when I told Luke he was going to cooking class he spent the whole day wondering what he was going to cook. I heard questions like:

"Mama, do you think that I am going to cook watermelon?"

"Mama, do you think that I can put the olive oil in the pan all by mySELF?"

"Mama, I want to make pasta and meatballs~!"

I had no idea what "cooking class" might entail ~ so when I saw Luke come home with his self strung food necklace I had to just laugh.........and when I saw his total pride and joy over his necklace, I laughed some more. He was a sweetheart and happily ate his dinner with his necklace on, and then ran around sharing pieces of it with Nate and Julia and I. Free classes at our gym rock. I am so into the cult.

Jake is GIANT. He had a weigh in at 7.5 weeks that put him at 14.14. By the time he is 2 months old he might be 16 lbs. My other kids were about 2 lbs smaller at that point, yet still huge percentile wise. I always had a theory about big babies being better sleepers. Great theory. It didn't include giant babies.....who may sleep a ton, but also eat a ton. I feel like Jake is becoming a part of my body, due to the frequency with which he nurses. Did I mention that we are also experiencing the hottest summer on record.....ever? My water broke on a 90+ degree with 90+% humidity in May.....and man did my boy bring the heat. We just had the hottest June on record and are on a streak of some ridiculous record of 90+ days here in July. This weekend it is supposed to be 100. 100 degrees. 100 degrees with a giant heater strapped to my body, be in in the sling or at the breast is just insane. I feel soggy, permanently soggy.

My lie went into effect on Monday as I put Jake in Kids Zone for the first time. He has been there three days in a row, for about an hour as I worked out. He is a little charmer and has allowed me plenty of time to work out while he flirts with the awesome girls who take care of him. The kids leave tomorrow with Nate to go up to visit their Grandparents as Nate plays in Uncle Rick's outing........this will be the first year since it started that I am not playing, and I will miss it horribly. The idea of pumping and bottles and heat and leaving the three kids just is way too much this year. I will miss it terribly and be thinking of Uncle Rick on Friday as everyone plays and celebrates the man who is missed so much. Jake will sleep, and I will rest and tackle some organization projects around the house, but I will miss the kids, and Nate, and all of our family so much.

Luke and Jules have decided that they are married. It makes me laugh to hear them talk about it. Jules is officially an underwear wearer at night, while Luke is still in a diaper overnight. She watches us put the diaper on Luke right before bed and says "Lukie it's okay, you can wear underwear when you wake up dry!". They seem like twins, more than kids born 13 months apart.

It is already over. My head is spinning. Where did the weekend that I so longed for go?

Pool, friends, soccer, baths, Turk's Head festival in WC, and house keeping........and now it is Sunday night. Life is just moving too fast. I will admit to counting the minutes till naptime......and then missing the stuffing out of my kids.

Happy Hour

Jake enjoyed his first swim, and even tolerated lots of splashing and love from his sibs.

Does this bathing suit make me look fat?

Waking with stretches and a smile, as per usual. I caught the stretch, not the smile.

My first baby, in the process of becoming a kid.

Playtime post "helping" give Jake a bath in the sink.

I love weekends. Really, really love weekends. We have taken to enjoying a family happy hour at the pool on Friday afternoons as soon as the kids wake up from their nap. Last night Nate and I went out and did the town in WC, then enjoyed a leisurely nap while watching the British Open, then headed to the pool. Jake took his first dip today, and loved the pool as much as he loves the bath. We did the whole "bathroom scale" trick where we weigh ourself, then ourself with Jake, and the scale showed him at 15 lbs at 7 weeks. I'm not entirely sold on the accuracy of our scale after suffering the abuses of two preschoolers, but from the way the kid is affecting my back, I bet that it is pretty close.

I cannot believe that we are into the latter part of July already. The next two weeks are jam packed....then two weeks at the beach, and then we are already facing back to school things as we approach having both Luke and Julia in preschool. I am loathe to admit that I am longing for cooler weather ~ as I know that I will be complaining about being stuck inside.........but somedays I feel just as trapped by the heat and humidity as I will be by the cold. What a hot summer this has been! Maybe it is always this hot but I am just especially noticing it being trapped inside of my post partum body and having a baby parasite constantly latched onto my body. Who knows.

Our cult (gym) just started offering awesome evening classes for kids. Luke now has a ton of classes to attend ~ from cooking to science to art to t-ball to soccer to kickball to basketball. He went to T-Ball for the first time last night. Jules and Jake and I watched, and Nate even got to witness Luke's first official foray into the world of non-driveway sport as he met us there straight from working in DC. I may suck as crafty Mama, but when it comes to sporty Mama, I got it down. Watching Luke "play" t-ball was a joy. I love his sweet little spirit. (here comes the braggy part..........consider yourself forewarned). Luke loves sports. He loves to play golf, and baseball, and basketball, and soccer, and you-name-it. I loved watching him from the position of outsider.......one thing that I really appreciate about Luke is the way that he likes to assess a situation. He has no fear of approaching new situations or new groups of people, he went into the group of kids after giving me a kiss and a "Bye Mama! I love you! I love baseball!" with a happy wave. He checked things out ~ and then once he got the idea, he went full throttle. Sports are really important to me as a Mother. Not necessarily them being good at sports, but enjoying them. To me ~ there is no better way to learn to work with others, to be healthy, to enjoy and know your body, and to know and learn what it is to be part of a team. He was so proud of himself when he ducked around two 6 year olds to fall on the ball (thanks to Daddy and Pop Pop and the fun "fumble drill" we play at home constantly) ~ he talked about it all night long. He hit the ball off of the tee like a champ. I got my first glimpse of how sports and my Mama Bear instinct will intersect as some little bratfaced kid (kidding! Some darling little sweetheart!) ripped the ball out of Luke's hand at one point. While my entire soul screamed to jump up and pummel said kid (I mean lovingly talk about sharing) I continued to just nurse Jake as I observed Luke. He gave the kid a look like "Dude?" and then ran along and picked up another ball. I was so proud. No crying, no fighting back, just my Luke and his easy going nature ~ "mmmmkay kid, you take my ball I'll go get another one~" with no drama or interference. My sweet Luke.

It is the weekend! A fun filled weekend with friends and yard work and cooking and golf lays ahead.......and I can't wait.

Dutch Wonderland

The kids were treated to a day at Dutch Wonderland courtesy of Mom Mom and Pop Pop. Jake and I tagged along.

My Disney fear is well documented. My skeeve at the sights (and smells) of the Wildwood boardwalk is tangible. Dorney park or the like? I get chills. (not the good kind). Heat, and lines, and general annoyance just make these places not my first choice in entertainment.

Dutch Wonderland surpassed all of my expectations. We got there right at 10, got right in, and the kids went on ride after ride. The place was amazingly clean, all of the staff was friendly and nice to the kids, and the other people were not nearly unrecognizable as humans as frequently happens in Wildwood. To say that the kids loved it would be an understatement. Jake was a perfect gentleman, sleeping away the day in the stroller and waking to nurse at very convenient times. Luke would not stop talking about the roller coaster, and Jules about the Ferris Wheel. The did pony rides, Luke and Pop Pop did the bumper cars together (I'm not sure which one actually had more fun) and they loved the log flume and pretty much every single ride they encountered. Lunch was delish and we tumbled out of the park around 1.30 hot and happy and vowing to go back.

Nate is away and after two much better nights, Jake pulled an all night nursefest again last night. Little bugger. My patience has been thin with Luke and Jules this week, I think that it is time to sneak Jake into kidzone ~ It has been just ungodly hot out and I have not been running as a result.......I think that I am starting to lose my mind from lack of exercise. Technically he can go in at 8 weeks.....so tomorrow (at 7w 1 day) he is really in his 8th week........sortov. Right?

Weekend

Grandma and Grandpa came down on Saturday, we went to a family party on Sunday, and Jake learned how to walk!

Just kidding, of course my 6 week old didn't learn how to walk.....but......he did learn how to laugh, how to roll over, and how to sleep longer every night.

I am happy ~ it is amazing how wonderful 3 or 4 hour stretches can feel when you are used to being up every 2 hours. Jake is officially my most social but most hungry baby ~ which equates to me getting less sleep and more laughs. More on our adventures at Dutch Wonderland to come. I'm beat.

Wordless Wednesday.

July 4th weekend

Bullet points because I am too incoherent with physical and mental exhaustion to form paragraphs.

*It was an awesome first trip to the beach as a family of 5.

*Jake was a champ on the beach at just 5 weeks of age. He started smiling socially before he was 4 weeks old, and now lavishes us with his beautiful, joyful smile regularily. He makes my heart skip a beat, he makes my nights worth it all.

*Luke and Julia picked right up where they left off last summer ~ the sand and ocean provide them endless joy and entertainment....they play with what nature provides and with their friends and family members with little more needed.

*I already knew that I am married to a man who I love ~ and I know that I lucked out in what a great father that he is ~ but in watching my husband play with and haul, and take care of and shower and dress and entertain and love our children, I continued to be amazed at how flat out lucky I got to be married to him.

*It was the most beautiful fourth that I can remember. Endless blue sky, a generous ocean breeze, cool nights with breathtaking sunsets, and a phenomenal fireworks show.

*My family spoils us with love.

*Julia transitioned to a bed, and a bed in the same room with her brother, seamlessly.

*I didn't get much sleep. Jake loves to nurse. LOVES. TO. NURSE. (All night)

*I am starting to hallucinate. Starting to forget conversations, to lose patience, to feel tired.

*Being a parent is unbelievably physical. The sheer work of getting three (very young) children up to the beach, entertain them, get them home, shower and change them, feed them, nurse them, put them to bed etc. is an endurance and patience test the likes of which I cannot fathom.

*I had one breakdown. I have been waiting for the postpartum hormones to hit. The crying, inadequate anxiety of a tired new mother combined with the care taking of my other children. I have been amazed at the way that I have not really felt them, other than my extreme sorrow at the initial birth-gone-awry misery. My theory has been that I don't have the luxury of feeling them ~ I am literally too busy, and too grateful. They hit me on Monday afternoon. Doh!

*The main reason that they hit me is that I was tired. I was tired, and nursing, and sitting under the umbrella in my fat postpartum body nursing a lot as Luke and Jules played with everyone.....everyone but me. I could hear their peals of laughter upwind off of the ocean as they cavorted in the surf........with everyone but me. I cringe even admitting this as I sense some sort of ingratitude in the words even as I write them. What Mother cries about their children LAUGHING? The one who longs to be the one causing that laughter, that's who. Does that make me selfish? Arrogant? I don't know. I simply felt trapped in the role of the rule maker....the sunblock applier, the "what do you say?~er", the "Don't throw that ball in the HOUSE!" the one who puts her kids in break. I felt as though I was trapped in the "mean Mama" role, and I loathed it. I say that with pain ~ I know that many kids don't have a small army of family and friends to give them joy, and I know that all I logically ought feel is gratitude that so many of our loved ones are able to enjoy entertaining our kids endlessly......But. But when did logic figure into feelings? But I miss them. I miss being not just their caretaker, but their joy maker. I know that when Jules gets a boo boo or Luke falls out of bed in the middle of the night it is me that they cry for and run to......but I miss being the person who makes them laugh the most. I feel tethered to Jake ~ tethered in a way that I choose and a way that I treasure....but tethered none the less.

*Logistics. Nap vs. beach time. Fire works or our beach party night vs. bedtime? Choosing what gives my kids more joy vs. more pain due to lost sleep and interrupted routines? Choosing how to enforce the idea of rules vs. the idea of fun. Choosing how to be the person who makes the rules, vs. the person who has the latitude to break them all. Choosing how to balance their wants, and our wants, with my kids needs. Choices. I know that my ultimate goal is to raise kids who know how to discipline themselves rather than be disciplined by others, to have kids who can go anywhere and do anything because they exhibit wisdom, to have children who eat well at every meal because that is all that they know, to have children who love one another without reservation, children who respect, and learn, and are ultimately respectful of their loved ones AND of one another.....but hot damn sometimes I just long to scream a resounding YES! to everything. Sometimes I just long to not have a vested interest in their development as humans, and to feed them candy and not care about their naps or their behavior and just indulge them as my children..........yet. Yet I know that to do so, to indulge them, to just do the easy thing ~ would be so fun, so very edifying in the moment, yet so painful in the long run, for them and for me. Gah. Finding the balance of "vacation" vs. home, "discipline" vs. tolerance, is a thin line, indeed. Sometimes I feel as though I fail to find it when in the presence of others who only represent fun to my kids. I don't know that that entire paragraph would make sense to anyone other than a parent of a preschooler, or two.

* We got home this afternoon. The unpacking/reorg routine hit. I officially moved Jules into her big girl room, which meant shifting all of her clothes and Jake's clothes. Food shopping. Entertaining the kids as the ride home was their nap. I am dog ass tired. (Did I mention that it is 102 here at home today? Awesome weather to have a newborn strapped to your body. I'm melting).

*I also have this stupid emotional thing going on ~ I admit it. I feel like an ass EVER complaining for one tiny second as I feel lucky beyond measure to have three healthy kids ~ to have children who we longed for and chose and planned for ~ I struggle with this feeling that to admit that I am tired is to somehow validate the idea that we took on too much, or had our kids too close together. I feel as though I need to constantly validate our choices by making it all seem easy. And I know that to do so would only do me a disservice, so here is my admission. We chose to have our children close. It makes for a lot of work, a lot of logistics, a lot of sleeplessness. And I would not have it any other way, given our wants and needs and abilities. BUT, that does not mean that it is not hard sometimes. So. So because the only very few people who have access to this blog care about us, I can admit it. It's freaking hard sometimes. It is worth it, I would not change it, but I also need to acknowledge it. It is hard sometimes. I feel like I need to channel a superhuman strength at times just to get through the day. Thing that I care about deeply get lost in the shuffle ~ I miss exercise when I simply can't get it. I miss being creative and patient when I simply don't have it. I miss reveling in every little smile or laugh or moment when I am thinking ahead to the next one. I miss sleep.

*Beyond all of my selfish wants and needs ~ I feel lucky that my kids are so surrounded by love.

July?

They take their job as caretakers of the tomato's very seriously and make a great team.

Nate feeding Jake a bottle of pumped milk for the first time.

Julia's new bedroom and bathroom painted and about 1/2 way done. Much to hang and do yet, but on our way.

Children of the corn.

I can't even believe that today is July 1st! Jake is 5 weeks old today, yet I feel like he has been here forever already. My sweet guy. He is my smiliest baby yet, kick starting his official smiles at only 3.5 weeks and now treating us to gummy grins all day long. Third child in now and those smiles still make my heart skip a beat. I have been packing up all of my maternity clothes all morning ~ and packing for the 5 of us to leave for the beach in the AM! Tonight Nate and I are leaving Jake for the first time to go to Gilmore's (my all time favorite restaurant) and meet up with friends in WC for Swingin Summer Thursday....then off to the beach come morning! I am more excited to go to the beach than I have been for a long time.....I can't wait to introduce Jake to all of our friends, to see Luke and Julia playing on the beach etc. etc. Cape May to me is all about great food, family, great friends, exercise, sunshine, outdoor showers, and the extra fun that the 4th brings like the big party on the beach, sparklers, beach olympics and fireworks to cap off the evening. Seeing it all through my kids eyes has made me fall in love with all of it in a whole new way, with a whole new depth and gratitude and joy.

I feel so lucky to be able to create the same sorts of traditions for my kids that my parents created for me.

I have a million thoughts about post partum women and bathing suit shopping bans, the state of the belly button (just for you, Jen) and about how preschoolers really ought to come with free Rx's for valium or other "Mothers little helpers" ~ but wee man is done nursing and my reprieve at the computer is done. Wishing everyone a happy and healthy 4th (in case you don't know sparklers can cause your children's clothing to catch on fire. My Mom just alerted me to this after she saw it on the news. My sister and I both looked at her like ~ "Uh, Mom? Sparklers are fire, isn't that just common sense?")